Last week I asked my readers their favorite things to do when they’re freaking out about their business.
Their answers were so good, I knew I had to share them with everyone!
And so, without further ado, I present The Art of The Business Freak-Out.
1. Eat ice cream while obsessing about the store that I want to be in, that I think will “make me.”
2. Find a new web comic and read five years of archives in one sitting.
3. Eat Oreo cookies while drinking wine.
4. Read everybody else’s sales copy and sulk about how mine will never be that good.
5. Spend lots of time “processing” what’s wrong with me in my journal.
6. Watch the latest episode of General Hospital & wonder how many hours of my life I’ve spent watching this show.
7. Do not under any circumstances leave the house. Or get dressed (if I do get dressed, make sure it makes me feel like an unfashionable slob).
8. Gaze longingly at the the wine and/or Bourbon. Wonder if it would really be so bad to have a little lunchtime nip by myself.
9. Wonder whether I should go beg for one of my old, shitty, part-time jobs back. Or any job, really.
10. Do not even attempt to recall any business success I’ve had whatsoever. If I do, immediately qualify it with two or three (or ten) negative things/”failures.”
11. Channel my 92 year old grandma: “This IS the end of me!”
12. Stare longingly at the Crown Royal bottle.
13. Cry and start making a list of all the other places I am a failure!
14. Look up bar jobs in my area.
15. Go on Facebook and stalk “successful” people.
16. Dejectedly watch a lot of Bravo! with a bottle of wine.
17. Talk my poor husband’s ear off about how I’m stressed.
18. Order Dominos. This is what I do!
19. Read trashy erotic fiction.
21. Watch reruns of Criminal Minds!
22. Not shower or bother changing.
23. Watch The Muppets.
24. Talk about getting a job at Target.
25. Drink [there were approximately 87 variations on this one].
I believe that if you’re going to freak out, at least do it in style!