Are you afraid to say that you love money?
Or is money your forbidden mistress?
You see, I’ve always loved money, and I’ve never been afraid to say it.
“Erika where’s the change?”
“Labor, mom. Labor. I can’t be walking all the way to the store to buy you groceries and not get paid for it. A girl needs her Laffy Taffy.”
Yes, this was an exact conversation I had with my mom when I was 8 years old.
Back in the day when you could send your kids to the corner store by themselves, I was the errand-runner when my mom forgot to buy milk, cream, butter or whatever at the big store.
And I always made sure I got paid.
And besides being an errand-girl I ‘conned’ my mom into all sorts of money-making shenanigans and chores.
: Memorizing Bible verses grossed me 15 cents a verse.
: I got 6 bucks for mowing the lawn.
: Washing & waxing the floor put ten bucks in my pocket.
: Zero cavities got me 5 bucks – you’ve never seen a kid so obsessed with brushing & flossing.
: A’s in school 5 bucks. B’s 4 bucks. And so on down the line.
And it didn’t stop with my mom. I convinced …
: My brother & sister to pay me to babysit the cats.
: To give me their old books, records, alarm clocks or whatever, and then I’d turn around and sell them at the garage sale my friend and I had every summer. It was a great money-maker until my sister showed up one time and saw a clock she had given me – now for sale.
“Hey, isn’t that the clock I gave you last week?” she asked.
“Sure is. If you’re in need of an alarm clock I can give you a GREAT deal on this one.” I replied.
If looks could rearrange my face, this one would have.
: And then there was the time I told my brother he could smash cake in my face – if he paid me 50 cents. Sure I wanted the money, but what I really wanted was to know what having cake smashed in one’s face felt like.
(FYI, it’s funny in movies. In real life it felt like getting punched in the nose with frosting. And frosting is really hard to get out of your nose.)
As you can see, I’ve been hustling my whole life. Why? Because I LOVE MONEY!
: It gives me freedom to see the world.
: To buy clothes that make me feel amazing.
: To invest in my own business and the business of others.
: To support charities that I believe in.
: To spoil my Mom.
I know that I’m lucky to love money so much, and really I thank my parents for this gift.
I wasn’t a spoiled child.
I had daily and weekly chores.
I got an allowance – and whatever else I could squeeze out of them for extra chores (or trips to the store).
And by the time I turned 14, I had my first job as a dishwasher and eventually got a promotion to ice-cream scooper – and ALL the free ice cream I could eat!
And from there it was waitressing and then, well, you know, stripping…
Loving money is important to success in business.
“If you feel ashamed about celebrating money, don’t expect money to celebrate you.”
– Marianne Williamson
Loving money shouldn’t make you feel like one of those cigar chomping fat cats ready to destroy an old folks home in order to build a strip mall.
Rather, loving money should make you feel like a blessed fairy godmother who can whisk a whole orphanage into Prada and buy them everything they want.
So imagine …
: Loving money so much that you never doubt your worth.
: Never cutting your prices or underselling yourself, because you KNOW you’re the best at what you do.
: Holding out for the customer who values your work and doesn’t haggle – even if it means eating rice and beans while you wait.
: Asking for money as easily as asking for a dirty Grey Goose Martini (extra olives please) at the end of a long day.
: Collecting money the same way you pick up the kids from daycare – promptly and attentively. I mean really, you are simply gathering up what is already yours.
But first you have to say the words – I Love Money.
And here some ideas to help you along:
#2 Sing it loud! Insert the word Money into your favorite song.
Try it out in this old Rod Stewart song just to see how easy it is – “If you want my MONEY, and you think I’m MONEY, money, money money know! If you really MONEY, just reach out and MONEY, money money money so!”
#3 Introduce yourself as ‘Money’ for a day – it’s fun! – look, here’s mine:
“Hi, I’m Money Lyremark, nice to meet you.”
(Which, by the way, is not a stretch – Lire (Italian money) + Mark (German money) – so it makes sense that I’m a walking talking money making machine!)
Say it 38 times in a row. Yes, now. Why would you wait to have your money love story come true?
1. Hi, I’m Money.
2. Hi, I’m Money.
3. Hi, I’m Money.
4. Hi, I’m Money.
5. Hi, I’m Money.
6. Hi, I’m Money.
7. Hi, I’m Money.
8. Hi, I’m Money.
9. Hi, I’m Money.
10. Hi, I’m Money.
11. Hi, I’m Money.
12. Hi, I’m Money.
13. Hi, I’m Money.
14. Hi, I’m Money.
15. Hi, I’m Money.
16. Hi, I’m Money.
17. Hi, I’m Money.
18. Hi, I’m Money.
19. Hi, I’m Money.
20. Hi, I’m Money.
21. Hi, I’m Money.
22. Hi, I’m Money.
23. Hi, I’m Money.
24. Hi, I’m Money.
25. Hi, I’m Money.
26. Hi, I’m Money.
27. Hi, I’m Money.
28. Hi, I’m Money.
29. Hi, I’m Money.
30. Hi, I’m Money.
31. Hi, I’m Money.
32. Hi, I’m Money.
33. Hi, I’m Money.
34. Hi, I’m Money.
35. Hi, I’m Money.
36. Hi, I’m Money.
37. Hi, I’m Money.
38. Hi, I’m Money.
See how easy that was! It’s hard to be afraid of something you just said 38 times.
Now then . . . go out and turn your secret money mistress into the money you can introduce to mom!