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After I hung up my stilettos as a midnight ballerina in the 1990s, I went on to co-create a commercial real estate investment company with my father.

One of our tenants couldn’t stand me.

He told my dad, “If Erika was a man, I would punch her.”

Charming.

So naturally, I made him part of my sales pitch.

Every time I was showing a prospective tenant a warehouse space, I’d say, “You can talk to any one of our ninety-plus tenants to see what kind of property owners we are. Just don’t talk to Gary. Because Gary hates me.” And then I’d tell them exactly what he said.

They always laughed. And they almost always signed.

The thing I was supposed to be embarrassed by became the thing that made people trust me. Gary, bless his heart, helped me lease more warehouse space than any polished pitch ever did.

XXXO

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When I was a stripper in the 1990s, one night, I was straddling a young lad (as was often the case), when the gentleman smiled, scanned me up and down and asked, “What do you think your best feature is?”

Without a moment’s hesitation, I replied, “My brain, of course!”

I’m pretty sure that’s not what he was expecting, but my response kicked his excitement up a few notches and my brain took his fantasy to regions he hadn’t expected.

For the next few hours, twenty-dollar bills flew out of his pocket and stuffed my garter belt. We discussed politics, philosophy, foreign films, algebraic equations, and practiced our French.

(At the time, I was studying all these topics in college. Don’t expect me to translate Les Misérables or tutor you in algebraic functions these days!)

And when his cash was fini, I bid him adieu.

Because a stripper’s basic tools are her derriere, her decolletage and her demoiselle parts, her mind is often overlooked.

In the club, I was never competing only against other women’s bodies. I was competing against the experience another dancer could create: how quickly she read the customer and made him feel as if the night had become more interesting because he met her.

Business is no different.

When I went full-time in my business in 2011, I didn’t have a huge list, famous name, or decade of receipts. More than once, a potential client was deciding between working with me and someone more established.

I hated hearing that because it forced me to answer one question––

––Why would someone choose me?

Not my title or my category—me.

That question became a private dossier that I used to my advantage. I could spot what made someone compelling, hear the buried line inside generic copy, and make a cluttered idea instantly marketable.

That was––and still is––my advantage.

Your real competition is not the person with the same title or offer. It’s the entrepreneur who knows how to use her mind with more originality than you are currently using yours.

Compete with your thinking & creativity. Every sharp observation, original idea, client result, and instinct you were right about––is your advantage.

XXXO

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I notice everything. Here’s this week’s line-up.

1. If you still think TikTok is just kids dancing and cat videos––DIOR is on TikTok Shop*. It’s one of the best places to find clients right now, and if you’re already posting reels on Instagram, just take that same content and post it on TikTok.

* If you don’t know what TikTok Shop is, it’s where creators post videos promoting a product and earn commissions every time someone buys through their link.

2. If I used Google reviews to promote my business, I would only ask a client for a review after they have picked up their purchase. Asking before? It’s like a restaurant server requesting a tip before you’ve even tasted your meal. You’ve got to properly earn a five star Google review just like you have to give exceptional service to get a top tier tip. 

3. I have a new criteria for taking photos at art museums because by the time I get home, I’m usually overwhelmed by how many pictures I’ve taken. So now I ask myself, “Would I buy this piece for my house?” Reclining Figure (For Rome) by Thomas Houseago at the Palm Springs Art Museum passed the test. Add to cart.

4. Fascinating. People say they want more sales, but then they avoid the exact conversations that would bring them money.

5. If I were a Chanel sales associate, I would fully expect my customers to also be buying Prada, Louis Vuitton, and Hermès. That wouldn’t threaten me. It would motivate me to make the Chanel experience so good they’d always come back. Not because Chanel is always better. Because I know how to spoil my customers in a way no one else can.

XXXO